By Christina Bagaglio Slentz
The holidays are marked by time with family — both the families we were born into and the families we have adopted and grown entangled with over the years.
If we are honest, we might admit to a little tension in these moments. Complicated family histories and differences of opinion challenge our openness to each other, tempting us to close ourselves off from one another in judgment. Enveloped in skepticism, we might not believe it possible to find common ground, though we share a common planetary home.
Helpfully, the gift of creation reveals a spirit of kinship embedded in God’s design, which calls us to set aside our earthly divides in favor of love and openness toward each and every person as a child of God — “siblings all” or, in the Italian, “Fratelli Tutti,” the title of Pope Francis’ third encyclical. But what does it mean to be the kind of sibling God wants us to be, and how might we, as families, foster “God with us” — Emmanuel — to help us embrace the perfectly imperfect joy of being family as we enter into Advent and prepare for Christmas?
Siblings in Scripture
In Scripture, family struggles begin pretty much “in the beginning,” as Cain, firstborn son of Adam and Eve, is moved with jealousy after God favors the offering of his brother Abel. In a rivalrous rage, he kills him. When God asks where Abel has gone, Cain denies knowing and responds with very adolescent-sounding sarcasm, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” What sorrow must have come to God and to his parents!
Fortunately, Cain and Abel are not our only example of sibling behavior. The hero of the book of Exodus, Moses, owes his life to the bravery and cleverness of his sister, Miriam, who at his mother’s instruction, places him as a newborn in a basket and follows him down the river to save him from the Pharoah’s infanticide. After Pharoah’s daughter finds and adopts Moses, Miriam brilliantly steps in to offer her mother as a wet nurse, reconnecting the infant with his mother. As Moses becomes a man and returns to his people as God’s chosen deliverer, Miriam, as well as her brother Aaron, become his most faithful supporters as he confronts Pharoah and leads his people out of Egypt to freedom.
Radical Call to Kinship
Perhaps no one in history has demonstrated greater fraternal love with all of God’s creation than St. Francis of Assisi. This coming year is the 800th anniversary of his “Canticle of the Creatures,” one of the oldest texts in Italian literature and one of the most powerful declarations of faith in our tradition. Composed in the last two years of St. Francis’ life, he expresses love and gratitude despite his significant ailments, praising God for the loveliness of creation.
“Praised be You, my Lord, with all Your creatures,” he sings, repeating “Praised be You, my Lord” throughout the canticle. With each declaration, he names a feature of creation as a sibling through whom he finds connection to and appreciation for God: Brother Sun, Sister Moon, Brother Wind, Sister Water, Brother Fire, Sister Mother Earth, reflecting his recognition of all earthly creatures as his fellow offspring.
St. Francis loved and was open to all God’s creatures; he preached to birds, kissed the leper, negotiated with wolves, welcomed women into his religious community, and traveled in the midst of the Crusades to dialogue with the Muslim Sultan of Palestine, Syria and Egypt, al-Malik al-Kamil.
Kinship in Our Homes
Aspiring to the example of St. Francis of Assisi is no small task. Most of us need a little help with our embrace of kinship, but with the “grace” of Christmas cookies and a little eggnog, these suggestions might bring love and joy to your family time and set a new course for 2025:
- Play games suitable for multigenerational groupings.
- Do non-controversial activities, such as puzzles, crafting or baking. Gingerbread house-building combines all of the above. Find eco-friendly Christmas crafts at https://www.gathered.how/arts-crafts/eco-friendly-christmas-crafts.
- View old movies/pictures to revive good memories.
- Get into nature to get away from the noise of technology and negative news cycles.
- Focus on faith! Sing carols or watch a faith-based Christmas movie such as “The Nativity” or “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” which ends with Linus’ reading of Luke 2:8-14.
- Pray for peace.
If you have more suggestions, please email cslentz@sdcatholic.org and send pictures if you give them a try. We will share them on our social media during the season.
