SAN DIEGO — Today, permanent deacons are a fixture at parishes throughout the Diocese of San Diego.
But that certainly wasn’t the case when Deacon Robert Ekhaml was ordained 50 years ago.
Pope Paul VI reestablished the permanent diaconate in 1967, after the idea had been proposed a few years earlier during the Second Vatican Council. For centuries before that, the only deacons serving in the Latin rite of the Catholic Church were transitional deacons, those for whom diaconal ordination was merely a step toward priestly ordination.
In 1970, San Diego became the first diocese west of the Mississippi to launch a formation program to prepare men for ordination to the permanent diaconate.
Deacon Ekhaml, now 85, was among those trailblazers. He is the last surviving member of the San Diego Diocese’s first ordination class of permanent deacons.
“It was so new, there was no roadmap, there was no nothing,” he said, recalling his experience in the four-year program alongside his four classmates.
Clarissa Martinez, associate director of the diocesan Office for the Permanent Diaconate, said that the diocese planted “a seed of hope” in 1974 with the ordination of its first permanent deacons and that “we are seeing the fruits of this harvest.”
“We thank the Lord for Deacon Bob for allowing us to recognize that the seed of hope that was sowed 50 years ago continues to bear fruit,” she said. “We pray and journey in hope for our 173 permanent deacons ordained and serving under our diocese, 27 candidates in the diaconate formation, 13 aspirants and 21 applicants on discernment to the diaconate.”
Born in St. Paul, Minnesota, Ekhaml moved to San Diego at age 13.
He attended Blessed Sacrament Parish School and St. Augustine High School. He then earned a bachelor’s in Chemistry at St. Mary’s College of California, located in Moraga.
After college, he turned down a pre-doctoral fellowship to study comparative biochemistry and an appointment to the Navy’s Officer Candidate School to attend the Paulist Fathers’ seminary in Washington, D.C.
He had considered the priesthood since he was a fifth-grader.
The period from 1961 to 1966 was “a very interesting time to be in the seminary,” he said.
The Second Vatican Council was then underway. He recalled that one of the seminary’s priests was a theological advisor at the Council, and he and his fellow students were kept abreast of the Council Fathers’ deliberations.
His time in the nation’s capital also coincided with other significant events. He watched President John F. Kennedy’s casket in procession down Pennsylvania Avenue and took part in a prayer vigil for the passage of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 at the Lincoln Memorial.
He ultimately decided that the priesthood was “not a fit” for him.
In 1967, he married his wife, Carol, with whom he has three children.
He worked as a forensic chemist with the San Diego County Sheriff’s Department, from 1967 to 1979, and then as an engineer for Pacific Tel, from 1979 until his retirement in 1997.
Deacon Ekhaml first learned that the Diocese of San Diego was seeking men to serve as permanent deacons courtesy of an announcement that appeared in The Southern Cross.
It seemed providential that his seminary studies, and his discernment that he was called to marriage instead of priesthood, all coincided with the restoration of the permanent diaconate as a possible vocation.
Deacon Ekhaml and the other members of his formation class became close, finding “a very strong sense of community” as they made diocesan history together.
“We didn’t know where we were going,” he said. “I think the program probably changed about four or five times over the four years of my formation –– you know, tweaking it here, tweaking it there –– and to be a part of that was very exciting.”
Deacon Ekhaml was ordained on Aug. 17, 1974, at St. Therese Parish in Del Cerro.
The day after his ordination, he assisted at the altar at a parish Mass for the first time. It was especially memorable for him because, during the liturgy, he baptized his youngest child.
Officially, Deacon Ekhaml was only ever assigned to St. Therese Parish.
But Father Peter Escalante, whose first parish assignment was as associate pastor of St. Therese Parish (1978-1981), requested the deacon’s assistance at his subsequent parish assignments –– St. Brigid, Santa Sophia, St. Joseph Cathedral, and Mission San Diego de Alcalá –– and Deacon Ekhaml was happy to help.
“During my 34 years as a pastor of several parishes around the diocese, Deacon Bob offered his unique gifts by serving in several capacities … I will be forever grateful for his years of collaboration, support and friendship,” Father Escalante said.
Deacon Ekhaml said he has had a “wealth of experiences” in ministry.
For about 25 years, he was the only diocesan clergyman fluent in American Sign Language, he said. When it was still part of the Diocese of San Diego, he drove up to Riverside monthly to assist at signed Masses for the deaf.
In 1987, he also served at a papal Mass celebrated by Pope John Paul II at the L.A. Memorial Coliseum.
He estimates that he has participated in more than 40 Cursillos.
Deacon Ekhaml retired from ministry at 75, but has continued to minister and, until a few years ago, was preaching regularly.
For the past three years, he said, he has attended morning assemblies and made classroom visits at St. Therese Academy.
“Deacon Bob is a beloved presence at St. Therese Academy, enriching our community with his unwavering commitment and inspiring spirit,” said Principal Alison Knoll. “Every morning, without fail, he greets students with his signature question: ‘What day is it?’ In unison, they joyfully respond: ‘This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.’”
“Deacon Bob then shares his wisdom and offers a blessing,” she said, “setting a tone of faith and positivity for the day ahead.”
Deacon Ekhaml, who is gratified that Catholics have taken “wholeheartedly” to the idea of deacons, has seen the ministry evolve over the past half-century.
What advice does he have for men discerning a call to the permanent diaconate?
“If you feel there’s any calling at all, pursue it,” he said.
“You learn an awful lot about your faith going through that preparation program,” he said, “and … if you decide at the end of it you don’t want it, you’ve got an experience that very few people have had, and it’s worth it.”
